# LIVING WITH IT! learning to acception! ;

Friday, September 28, 2007

torn into pieces, 3:39 AM

noe wad, i think i have improve myself leh.
so proud of being patient and control my jealousy.
yeah!!!!!!!

tonight, i found out something. 2 things some more. hee.
A DOUBLE SHOT ON ME. BANG! BANG!
but i guess i will be alrite with it.
i think if i continue to be like last tym, anytime a fight can start and maybe will result in the same fight.
hehe. but i dowan lah. so sick and tired of it. hee.

so i am slowly accepting things the way they are and the way you are.
and i hope you will appreciate it. THX. LUV YA.

a charming boy huh. not onli tat but attractive 2 girls oso lah. no wonder.
accept it.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:55 PM

woke up at ard 12 today. was awaken by call from khabaria. haiyoh.
then i tried to slp again, but cannot bcos dini all wake up already.
so slpy sey. wake up so early. hehe.
then dini pampers was like anytime can tear. so i decided to bathe her lah.
dress her up and feed her. clean the house today. helped my aunt with the kuih.

den now here i am blogging. nothing to do. haha!
noe wad, yesterday i bought a dvd but the player cannot read cheap disc.
so fed up. i think i wana return it or buy new one.

then the best thing is tat my laptop kena virus. wad the hell. argh!
then the whole screen went blank. the start button and all the icons are missing!!!
i dun mind reboot the lappie again but i want all my pictures and songs inside!!
stoopid lah. lucky im clever enough to know how to access to msn and internet.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:27 AM

back at home, echal was here with us, with my babies.

took some pictures together.

we had fun together.

dini who was unable to walked, suddenly was seen jumping aroung when echal played the bubbles with her and sofia.

it was so funny.

once you see an unabled kid standing up and saying "pain" all the time, then you see the kid jumping here and there.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:14 AM

trip to geylang with the hockey peeps on sunday.

just wana post the pictures onli. hehe. =)

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:03 AM

phew! like finally, put all the 3 babies to sleep already.

feel so sad looking at them.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:50 AM

im just so sad to fetched my niece from that kind of place. like wad da hell a baby doing in that freaking place.

then she refused to follow me back home. she screamed her heart out. i was like asking myself, "she forget me already as her aunt is it?". i felt sad. she den vomitted and crying like hell. i screamed at her to shut up in front of my frens. then quietly in the taxi she fell asleep.

brought her back home, by the she was awake, i bathed her and tried to put her to sleep. but she was playing with sofia. i was dressing her when i saw her ankle and whole foot was so swollen. i felt so sad. it must have hurt badly. i took oil and massage her foot and wrapped it with bandage. she cannot walked for now. i thought of bringing her to the doctor tmr.

my heart is like crying wen i saw her foot. she looked helpless. had to carry her around the house and being careful with her foot. what happened lah. can you please take care of her properly and in a decent environment.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:27 AM

i duno whether i shud write this entry or not.

its not self-praising or self-boasting of myself.

i just feel like im patient enuf to tolerate things that happened in my life.

and to add, i told myself not to cry much and make myself suffer.

i must learn to forget things and be happy and accept things the way they are.

and im so proud of myself.

for this holy month, i promise myself to be more patient and till now, abt 2 weeks of puasa, i feel like im quite happy with some things and with myself, except for some things lah. haha!

i hope to be and stay as patient like this even if puasa month ends.

some things just cannot be tolerate but i have to bear with it.

its just so frustrated to see things like that.

and i hate some things!!!

hate it so much!

why must things turn out to be that way.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:18 AM

girls day out.

i think limin, sya and xinni will write on wad happened today.

hehe. can just go to their blog and read.

we went to buy skinny pants today. me and xinni bought it at first then force limin sya to just try it out. but they dowan.i insisted of them to just try. so limin who is dare enuf try it onli.wen she wore it, we were like saying its nice on her. and finally she bought it! haha! dare of the day!then went to eat ljs den off to town to play pool at lucky plaza. tis time, limin duno how to play pool. haha! walao! we persuaded her to just give it a shot. and she tried. but her hand tremble though. haha! another dare of the day for you.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:59 AM

i just feel so sad for them.
i feel like wana cry when hearing what he said.
its so rare and hard for a guy to say and do that.

its so sad.
i just hope all the best for them and hope they will be happy with the decision they make.
as frens, we can just help them and support them and be by their sides when they need us.

to the two of u, please take good care of urself k. n be hapi n smile owaz.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:48 AM

the girls of insomnia.

we are crazy to stay till late and wake up late too!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:17 AM

i see everyone is like improving and re-designing their blog.
looks like quite fun.
but im jus lazy lah to all this.
i jus wan my blog to be simple. hah!

today i went to ivy's house with limin, sya and xinni.
jus to have a look at her and chat with her lah since we all got nothing to do.
wanted to go delta and watch the game but it was cancelled.

stayed at her house till abt 12.
den i walked home.
now online again.
duno till wad time i will be online.
hah! crazy.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 5:26 PM

sumthing i learn yesterday. quite true.

"u can learn to give more but u cannot expect much in return"

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:55 AM

http://www.tabblo.com/studio/stories/view/342638/

TO NYP HOCKEY PLAYERS, CHECK THIS WEBSITE OUT!

ITS DAMN COOL AND FUNNY!

HAHA!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:38 AM

i'm just trying this out since im so bored. haha!

hope it looks nice.

i love you.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:15 PM

"life is cruel n its gonna hit u hard,not letting u get up. tats y u hav to stand up n fight coz its aint over until its over. coz u are more than juz to give up."

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:05 PM

i hope and guess we are alright now.

i hope im mature enuf cos i had enuf. hah! tats so crap.

she told me that i have to be a strong and tough gurl in order to be with him.
i guess i am really strong. hah!
n i hope to be as strong as a steel.
i think steel is aren't good enough.
something stronger i guess?

but how strong can i be?

what a charm he have lah. hah! urgh.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 3:50 AM

so bored.
nothing to do.
no mood to sleep.
no mood to eat.
no mood to do anything.

BUT i guess im feeling quite ok this time.
stronger i guess.
rather than just brood and feel sad all the time.
im trying to be happy.
told myself before i must be happy no matter what.
this is life.

"DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY"

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:07 PM

im so sad.

im being said by things that i never intend or will never do.

im so hurt.

especially when it was said by my loved one.

im so disappointed.

to you and others, i am a BAD BAD BAD girlfriend.

you can choose to kick me off k if that really makes you happy.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:49 AM

with all that has been happening in life, at least i still have the courage to stand up...that is something worth celebrating.

when its all over and when u look back and survive it..u noe ur stronger now than before.

THIS IS SO MEANINGFUL FOR ME AND I TINK TO ALL OF US TOO.

THANKS AGAIN, NAD!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:47 AM

LIFE IS ALL ABOUT SUPRISES!

LIFE IS A JOKE!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:36 AM

limin ask to me update my blog. haha!
duno wad to update lah.
wana change my blog layout oso, but im quite happy with it.
cos its just me and all abt me. hee.

my day was just simple la.
go for floorball trg. was so tired.

dowan to brag on on something la cos im jus sick and tired of it.
i jus wana be mature and jus move on.
i dowan to tink so much abt it lah.
never-ending problems.

jus wana have patience in me-moreover its the fasting month.

btw thx nad! luv ya! <3

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 3:23 PM

this is the pictures which was taken on the premier men semis.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:17 PM

i wan to buy this!!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 12:12 AM

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 3:56 PM

echal 13

guess what people! the person in this pix is my new IDOL!!

u should have seen him play in m'sia.

FANTASTIC! WOOHOO! GO DEAR!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 3:06 PM

"Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections."

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:59 PM

i got my exam results......

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:56 PM

i feel like choking myself.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 11:31 PM

i nearly suffer from a mild concussion.

n how i wish it will......

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 10:47 PM

im back from the KL trip.
i had lotsa fun and i hope you guys and girls had fun too.

right now. today Ramadhan starts.
and im confused and puzzled about myself.
things arent the same anymore.

this month gonna be a challenging for me and people around me.
i hope to have tat patience.

i hate us to be different. things arent still well for us.
he's changing towards me.
he is not wad he is.
and im so sad about that.
i love him for who he is.
a small change to him is a total change for us.
we are not wad we are.
i am so upset.
please dun change that much.
its making me suffering.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 8:36 PM

i jus wana say i love u.

n i hate us to be different cos its jus not us.

n its really hurting 4 me and you too.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:15 AM

it has been a week.
when is it going to end?

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:06 AM

im feeling troubled.
im feeling so tired.

but i had a nice time with him today at sentosa even though it was not as fun as last time.
not so fun but i still enjoy being with him.
HAPPY AND GLAD TO BE WITH HIM.
it was quite hard to see his teeth, smile and laugh.
it was also quite hard and painful for me to see him like this.
thx 4 going to sentosa with him.

have to be happy in our life rite even though have to live in pretence.
i jus hope tat everything going to be over and fine soon so that we can lead our own and normal and happy life as before.

for now, i have to be strong and force myself to be happy.

i miss the old you and us.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:53 AM

okkaayy people.
know wad! from today onwards, i will onli write the happy moments and things in this blog!
i wan to feel and think of the happy things only.
i wan to be happy.
i wan my life to be happy.
i wan to be reminded of the happy things.
and also i wan the people around me to be happy.

(but how abt the sad things??) haha! gile nye hazlin!

i wan to stay positive!

i am sorry if i hurt you or the people around me.
i can't help it. haha! (im jus joking lah). stop it hazlin!

i will start here and now.
wen to meet dear jus now to buy shirts for the nyp hockey trip.
then we kept talking abt floorball on the bike.
non-stop. i was so glad to see him being normal. yah, i guess slowly lah, takes time right.

then wen to bugis and eat ljs with his brother.
while waiting for his bro to finish chatting on the hp, we played this game.
i held his both hands tight and stand at the edge of a kerb, and i try to drop my weight backwards.
it was kinda scary cos i scared he will tricked me. and will make me fall.
and also our hands were wet! haha.

we were laughing and were so happy.
it was so nice to see him smile and laugh. he tried the game oso.
but i was so weak to hold and support him. hehe.
tat was so fun dear.

after a long weak of no-laughter. hee.
thx again dear. hope u regain urself back.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:12 PM

i really miss the old us.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 9:37 AM

i feel bad hurting you.
i dowan us to be like this.
i wan the hapi and crazy us back!!!
why these things happening to us.
it suppose to bring us closer but things turn otherwise.
can you tell me why.
i dowan to feel this way.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 3:28 PM

Once in a lifetime means there is no second chance
So I believe tat you n me should grab it while we can
Make it last forever n never give it up
Its all time n im loving where we at

Because this moment it’s really all we have

*Everyday of our life
Wanna find thru tat wanna hold on tight
Gotta run while we young n keep the faith
Everyday, from right now
Gonna use our voice n scream out loud
Take my hand n together we celebrate oh, everyday

They say tat u should follow
And chase them wad u dream
But if u get lost and lose yourself
White doesn’t relate me
No matter where we going
It start from where we are

It’s more to life when we listen to our hearts
N because of you I’ve got the strength to start
*
Take it back doing it here together
Its beta like tat n stronger now than ever
I never to lose and we get to choose
Its how its gonna be

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:46 PM

a taxi driver told me this morning,

"everyone have problems in their life, but its the matter how you handle it!"

i miss you so much

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:35 AM

my fren told me

"I AM NOT BORN TO SUFFER BUT I AM BORN TO INTO THIS WORLD TO FACE CHALLENGES AND BECOME STRONGER!".

thx NAD! i lub u! hah! muackks!!

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 4:00 PM

There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying things which are beyond the power of our will.

Epictetus

To be happy, we must not be too concerned with others.

Albert Camus

No longer forward nor behindI look in hope and fear;But grateful take the good I find,The best of now and here.

John G. Whittier

Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

Oliver Goldsmith

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:40 PM

i NEVER EVER say tat u cant make frens or be frens with who.

i jus dun prefer u 2 be close.
is tat too much to ask for.

its all not true n its onli ur assumptions.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 1:06 AM

im sick and tired of everything.

my heart is breaking apart slowly.

my mind is losing it too.

maybe im born to suffer in this world

thanks everyone.

♥its healing.

torn into pieces, 2:59 AM

what a picture!

we took about 10 mins to take this pix!

all bcos of me. ahaha!

the dark room GANG! hee.

♥its healing.